Getting to Know How to be in a Family

The last few days have been full of ups and downs for all the girls (Eden included).  What family doesn’t have ups and downs?  We are getting to know each other and I am remembering how adoption disrupts everything.  I am reminded of a dear friend’s words saying that adoption was not part of God’s original plan.  Adoption has to take place because we live in a fallen world.  I wish to goodness that none of my girls had experienced abandonment, orphanage life, “survival”, even though that means I would never have had the opportunity to love them.  That being said, I praise Jesus that He chose Brandon and I to be the ones that get to love these precious girls!  It is not easy bringing two more teens into the family and I have no idea how this will work with Eden.  All I can do is trust that God will be true to His word (which He will be whether I trust or not) and He will finish the good work He started.  He will see us through.  He will provide.  He will be the calm in the middle of the storm that inevitably awaits us upon arriving home. 

Tilly’s ups…….she is coming out of her shell a bit.  She held my hand crossing the road (probably out of fear of death by vehicular man slaughter!).  She held Phoebe’s hand and Phoebe was soooo excited!  She joined in on some momma tickling, both on the giving and receiving end.  She is still working on her English and is doing very well.  She is speaking up and voicing her opinion a bit more!  She also showed me a boo boo (huge knot) on her leg that she got at the park 2 days ago. 

Tilly’s downs…..not many!  She is into everything and very sneaky.  She got into my suitcase and found the Christmas gifts and told the girls!!!  I had worked so stinking hard to prepare Christmas and keep it a secret from Phoebe!!!! Oh well!  Tilly also gets her feelings hurt very easily.  Lyric yelled at her today and she ran off to the bathroom to cry.  After Phoebe translated, I pulled everyone together. Tilly tried to escape (I think she thought she was in trouble).  I got Phoebe to translate, and Lyric to apologize and Tilly to smile! Go Mom!!!!  It was quite funny how all that occurred.  We were having a pillow fight.  You could tell that Tilly wanted to join in but sat back and watched.  When she got the courage, she smacked Daddy with the pillow.  Lyric started yelling and that is when Tilly took off.  I asked Phoebe for the translation and this is what Lyric had yelled at Tilly, “That’s my BaBa!  You don’t hit my BaBa!”  Needless to say, we had to explain that BaBa is Phoebe’s, Tilly’s, Lyric’s, and Eden’s BaBa!....”Oh..OK” (Lyric’s response!)

Lyric’s ups…..She is a stinkin hoot!  She is being a bit more independent which is great and was being met with much resistance.  She is vocal and playful.  She is working on her manners.  When she burps (with her mouth wide open) J she says “excus-eh-me” every time!  She is a great hugger.  She is quick to apologize when you explain what she did and how it was wrong.

Lyric’s downs….Oh My!!!!  “MaMa..America is boring…I want to go to the orphanage”.  If I heard that once today, I heard it a thousand times.  Now let me reassure you….I am not making fun of her….She has learned to whine to get her way.  She is so adorable and persistent that somehow it has worked for her in the orphanage.   Her whining is in no way comparable to the sadness and fear and anger a lot of the older girls from Huainan have experienced.  She will be in my face, begging me to take her back one second and the next second I am getting kisses and laughs, then it is back to taking her back, then she laughs at herself.  She is a mess!  Oh…she likes to wake up at 5 am and grunt and cry till we get up.  She has told Phoebe that when we get to America she will continue to get up that early and cry until we all get up.  Again…she is a mess.  Adorable, but a mess!  I will have my hands full with her.

I talked about their ups and downs with a little humor, but please pray for them.  They don’t know how to be part of a family.  They were happy where they were and we took them away.  They had few if any responsibilities.  No one cared how they acted or treated others.  No one invested in their studies.  When we get home, and structure and rules start to impact their world, they will go spinning out of control.  It may last days, weeks, months or a year for them to gain a little self-control and adjust to their new life. 

Yesterday we went to the City Wall.  It is like the city wall in Beijing.  It surrounded the city during the first dynasty.  It takes 2 hours to ride a bike all the way around.  It is wide enough for 4 chariots to ride side by side.  We did not stay long due to the extreme cold and someone having a belly ache….how I hate taking my girls in squatty potties!!  At least that one was clean and the smell was not horrid!  The rest of the day was spent inside and the bored one did quite well at controlling herself!!!  We ordered pizza (yes, I have had 2 margaritas nowJ) for dinner.  The owner, Annie, made the delivery and invited us to a Christmas dinner at her pizza shop tomorrow.  She said she will come pick us up!!!!  We finished The New Karate Kid and headed to bed.

We got up bright and early thanks to LyricJ.  She was told that if she woke up before everyone that she needed to be thoughtful and quiet until we got up.  If not, she would not be allowed to go to the park.

After breakfast, and me washing my second load of clothes in the tub (happy times), Phoebe, Tilly, and I headed off to the park.  The girls played and that was the point Tilly started coming out of her shell.  She is more comfortable around Phoebe because Phoebe is a bit reserved yet very helpful and encouraging.  Lyric has to get in your face to see you good and Tilly likes her space.  We played for about an hour and a half then headed back to get Lyric and Daddy for lunch.  We tried a new place (thank the Lord) and B and I really enjoyed it.  The girls like the other place better, but they were ok with it.  After lunch, we found a local outdoor market.  By market I mean market!!! The street was lined with vendors of mostly old stuff or trinkets but there was a lot of useful stuff for the locals.  I have never seen anything like it in my life.  We did not make it through half of it.  It was a bit dangerous (mopeds) and I almost got ran over.  Instead of my knight in shining armor making sure I was ok, he laughed!!!!  He might just get pushed tomorrow!!! Just kidding!!!

We came back to the room and I took about an hour nap.  When I got up, we all played and had the incident I spoke of earlier.  Next, it was dinner at the place we have been every day.  Yippy!!  We walked in and I think the expression on their face said, “Yippy” too.  I don’t think they like us very much and I am not sure why.  They kept taking the cloth napkins off the table and my girls would get up and get them.  Finally after about our 4^th visit, they told us not to use them.  You have to pay for paper napkins, so I just told the girls to use the tablecloth!!!  I think we are a lot of work!  My head was still hurting and I have reached the point of no longer being able to handle mildew, mold, and what ever other funky stuff is growing in there, so I headed back to the room while they ate supper.

Tomorrow we have to hang out and wait for Tilly’s paperwork.  We should be able to go to the park in the afternoon, then hopefully to the pizza shop for dinner!  Thursday morning we will celebrate Christmas, pack, and head out after lunch for Guangzhou!!!  Very very excited about that. New scenery, a step closer to home and STARBUCKS IN THE HOTEL!!!!!! I usually love the coffee in China and it was great in Beijing and Hefei, but here in Xi’an…yuck!!!!!!!  Oh..there is also a great Japanese restaurant in the hotel.  There is a small, small playground there.  I am not a fan of McDonald’s, but that will be right next door and I am sooooo getting fries and chicken nuggets.  All my healthy friends, no need to post anything about what is in them, I DON’T CARE as long as it is not rice or noodles!!!!  The subway there is easy to use and there are 2 beautiful walking parks nearby.  The weather is waaaay better.  There is also a zoo that we have been told is very nice.  The island is there…. Needless to say, I am ready to leave Xi’an.  I have enjoyed it, but I honestly believe we are the only Americans here in a city of 6 million people! 

8 more days people…8 more days!!!  Eden and Sonic here I come!!!  I truly only care about Eden, but after her….Sonic sweet Tea is at the top of my lists of things I will have on Thursday!!!! Oh wait..I guess Sonic will be closed on New Years DayL Anyone that loves me can bring me a sweet tea with no ice to the airport so I can have it Thursday when I wake up!!  Just kidding… I will wait til Friday.  I am learning patience from the beautiful Chinese people! 

                                                   This is what the girls have every day!!!

                                                        Someone sabotaged our phones.
                                      Selfies and lots of them on mom and dad's phones!!!

                                              This is for my Daddy, Momma, and Daniel...
                                You can only imagine the caption Brandon said use for this...
                                    "Are those your legs or are you riding a chicken?!!!!"
                                                    I almost punched him in the mouth!

    One more day down, 8 more to go!!!

Loving and trusting my Jesus more every day!!!